I'm All Grown Up :DD

*insert emotional and insightful post about how i have grown as a person here* No, but seriously I guess I have grown a little bit as time as passed here at college. It was a hell of an intro to the beginning of my own life. But I've met some amazing people, made good memories and ready for whatever college has for me. Yes, that even includes finals.

I've made some amazing friends. Without them I don't know what I would have done. I mean, i've been  more social this semester than I have for a good portion of my life. But I guess that is what college does to people. I'm happy. I can honestly say I am happy. It's been a while since I have been able to say it and it feels good. I have some amazing people who are standing with me and I have their back. 

I would say i've learned a lot here in college. I'm still that strange adorable friend that I have always been but I have grown more as a person. I've seen more of the world and it's changed me. I welcome this change. I had always been a bit of a loner and did my own thing. It was just my thing. However, college has shown me that that the world is so much larger and there are far more people out there like me. I've opened up a bit more and I have all the wonderful people at ISU to thank for hat.

What The Hixson Award Means To Me

The Hixson Award means a lot to me. It was essentially  because of this scholarship that I was able to even come to Iowa State University. I come from a lower middle class family. We were able to sustain ourselves and what few pets we had, but when the prospect of college reared its ugly head everyone was scared. Especially when the talk of Iowa State University came around. My step father had just come began recovering from a really nasty accident at work that left him in a hospital bed for several months, and with bills piling and up and him being out of work I was scared. Scared for my family and scared for myself. 

When we found out about this scholarship we were ecstatic about what i could mean for me. A lot was hanging on me getting scholarships, this one specifically. When we opened the ail that faithful day and I opened that yellow letter. I was so happy. It was that day my goals were set in stone. I have loved my experience here at Iowa State University. The people I have met, the new experiences I have had here have started shaping me to be the type of person I want to be. Which is as much of what I was hoping to get out of college as a degree. That is what the Hixson Award means to me. A chance to let myself find what I want to do with my life. Who I wand to be and how I want to live.

Diversity - My Definition

        Diversity, it's hard to define. What makes it hard to define is that everyone has their own little definition for it in their head but nobody is willing to say it out loud for fear of being ridiculed. The little event that we had for the Hixson class really helped to clarify some of the difficulties that arise when diversity is mentioned. 

        When we had our guest speaker come and talk to us I have to admit I was kind of dreading it. I keep having these flash backs to how these types of things in high school were. I guess it has just become engraved into my brain. Now if the rest of you guys have had a lot of guest speakers in your classes and have gone to different events and what not then you should know that this is not in fact the case. It was informative and really relaxed. Be it whether I have simply matured an these tissues no longer are awkward for me or they simply have become desensitizing. Either way It was informative and thought provoking.

        To me, the definition of diversity are all of the unique things about everyone that when we all come together allow is to differentiate between one another. Be it physically, mentally, or culturally each one of us is unique in our own way. Yes, we may belong to certain "groups" because we have similarities but each one of us is different in our own way. That to me s the definition of diversity. 

Diversity Event

       I went to a diversity event in the Memorial Union, or more so waited for the event to start outside in the cold because of a random fire alarm, but I digress. I thought that the event that I was going to was going to be your typical lecture that everyone remembers from high school. "Drugs are bad. Sex is bad. Alcohol is illegal for you. If you do any of these things they're bad for you and you're too young for them" blah blah blah. We all remember those. They all tried to shove their point of view of it all being "bad" down our throats which is what i expected when I went to this event. Boy was I wrong.

      Sex Drugs & Alcohol, a rather controversial topic if you were to be hearing about this in high school but this is college, people have grown up and it's not as awkward as it once was. This was a rather entertaining lecture, if you would even call it that. She obviously knew where we were coming from and had accepted the fact that this is college we are bound to explore our lives a little bit and find out what we do and don't like. However, as she was quick to point out. Don't be stupid about it. Yes, this is college. A time to figure out yourself and your life, you need to be safe and don;t ruin your life before you figure out what you want to do with your life.

      So all in all it was a lecture that I was glad I went to. It was informative from someone who knew our perspective would be different and accepted that. She was informative and a a speaker I would love to go and see again.

Social Media Week

     Social Media, or as I like to call it the bane of productivity. It seemed as time and time went on I became less and less productive whenever I visited the website as I spent more and more of my time not necessarily doing what I was supposed to do, which was communicating with the people I had made connections with, but spending endless time looking up what other people had posted. My Twitter had become something of an escape of the real world where stress and negativity ruled.

     After spending a little more than a week on Twitter I can see why it's so popular and riddled with fake accounts. The anonymity that it provides is astounding. Online you can be whoever you want and find hundreds of other people just like you. You don't have to be you as seen in your social circle. It was something interesting not only to be a part of but also to see what there people were doing online.

     All in all a lot of the "communicating" i did with people was going over there Twitter and all of the random stuff they posted. I myself found it a little difficult to get out and communicate with others who I had no idea who they were, which might indicate the introverted part of me, however i am more than sure that there are plenty of people that take advantage of such a thing and more power to them. We have an amazing tool at our disposal. We might as well use it.

MBTI's - Who Are You Really?

               Throughout my life I have had to take many so called personality surveys that say they'll be able to determine who you really are and offer insightful advice into who you are and other typical lies such as that. Now I'm not bagging on them it's just that through basic self evaluation the same results can be achieved by an everyday person. There was something about this certain test that was....different about it that caught my attention. It was more than a simple copy paste job that your average middle school-er could do for an assignment. It actually we in depth about who you were. Someone had actually put time and work into this evaluation. Through it I learned more about the type of attitude I carry and how other people perceive me as well as how I am able to learn properly.


               I learned I was a bit of an introvert. Now, I had always kind of known this being the sky awkward kid in all my years of school, however my attitude fluctuated depending on the people I was with. Though I guess we're all a little like that. Though, according to the MBTI I was generally more of a natural introvert. This explains why I have some trouble in social situations or why I always looked on and saw big ocial group and often wondered why I couldn't be in that group. So maybe I need to get out of my bubble  a little bit. I guess its nice to be a little bit of an introvert, seeing as ho it has its advantages and disadvantages, but it should be good to reach out of my bubble.

                I learned through the MBTI that I am more of a Sensing person. this means I like things more when I can feel them and see them. Essentially I like working with my hands. I guess I should have seen this from a long time ago considering my long love of Legos. Yes, admit it it. We all loved Legos. I guess this will really come in handy in my field of study. Can you guess it? Well you're wrong! It's Engineering.
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               So all in all the MBTI was actually a really helpful self assessment survey that goes into depth about a persons inner self through it's own definitions and viewpoints. It definnetley does a good job and I will be certain to implement what I learned into succeeding in college.

Not Your Average Bucket List

The fabled bucket list. A list of the most creative/insane things you want to do before you well, kick the bucket. Everybody's created at least one in their life either out of jest or in full seriousness. I've created one with friends, not thinking I would ever see it again, but as the days go by you start thinking about the things you want to do before your life's over. So without further adieu, here is my bucket list in  all its glory.

• Go solo skydiving at least once
• Shoot a .50 caliber rifle 
• Learn to fly an airplane 
• Build a cannon/mortar 
• Drop something from the Eiffel Tower 
• Snowboard/ski down a mountain
• Climb a building assassin style 
• Paint something on the top of the New Hartford water tower 
• Play a round on the Dike golf course
• Demolish an abandoned building 
• Go scuba diving
• Get in a fist fight with a stranger and lose
• Send a weather balloon with a camera attached into space
• Visit an abandoned Ghost Town

Helping a Friend In Need

High School

Over the Years

Everybody remembers those days. Joking around in the halls before class with friends. Racing back to class realizing you drastically over-judged the time you had before the bell rang, and miraculously, the teacher didn't see you sneak in and take a seat. You had your group of friends you have had since forever ago. Coming from a small class of fifty five in my graduating class, we all got to know each other really well. We got to know who we really were, and we all loved each other. For the most part anyway. 

You grew together as a class. You helped each other out if you need help. You did it out of  the fact that you were close.You looked out for each other, because over the years you had become a family. That bond was tested in my high school senior year.

The Incident

Someone had been suspended. Rumors were spreading like wildfire, "Did you hear Zak got suspended? "Yeah he got in a fight with someone! The P.E teacher kicked him out of class and sent him to the principals office!". These were just some of the rumors being spread around. Apparently Zak had been suspended for getting in a fight with a student over something. Zak was known in our school for being extremely open about his sexuality. He was bisexual, and was perfectly comfortable with it and told anybody he met. This got him all sorts of grief from people. People who hid their homophobia and confusion amongst slurs and rude comments to and behind his back. 

People were spreading rumors and talking bad about him more than ever before. All the while I'm thinking in my head, " What happened to our family?" Nobody was standing up for Zak who had simply gotten tired of taking everyone's negative attitude about his sexuality and snapped at a rude comment. He was only as human as the rest of us. My family was starting to fall apart.

History Class 

History class was when some hope for my senior class, as well as a lot of the underclassmen was restored. After hearing so much about Zak and what he had done, I decided to take a stand. I defended an openly bisexual man in front of his peers. The hot button issue that everyone had views on. I had no idea how much support my stand against the obvious homophobic jocks of the freshmen class was going to rally. Fellow seniors, freshmen, juniors and sophomores all stood up in agreement with me. We had all had enough of everyone giving Zak so much grief and demanded that it stop. He was as human as the rest of us and deserved such. As I looked on and saw people openly supporting and displaying their sympathies for Zak did a wayward thought thought cause a massive smile to grace my face. We were a family again. All we needed was a little shove.

Aftermath

People settled their disputes with each other and Zak finally came back to school and people resumed their normal lives. People went back to making fun of each other as they always do. People went back to taking about drama and sports. However, people never looked at Zak or I the same again.